Everything Under the Sun

Carl Jung pioneered the field of analytical psychology, which split with Freud's psychoanalysis and became Jungian psychology. Three of his most powerful conceptual understandings were the Shadow, Synchronicity, and Individuation. In this essay, I want to discuss individuation. Individuation is the process in which an individual self develops out of an undifferentiated (or chaotic) unconscious. This unconscious is in a sense the collective unconscious. Individuation is a process during which the elements of personality, components of the immature psyche and experiences from one's life compile into a integrated whole. It has been described as the process by which an individual leaves group attachment (collective unconscious) and self-absorption (narcissism).   I want to make a few points on this topic. One, related to the point I was trying to make in my essay, The Devolution of Authenticity, that the modern environment is preventing individuation, or at least providing a plet...

Once, I fell in love.  It wasn't that hard.  But, it was a dream,  That took me only so far. When I finally woke up,  It was like I'd fallen in mud. I was stuck in my ways, But the whole thing was done.  Now I've come back to Earth, My head no longer in the clouds.  And I feel ready to start,  But what do I do now? 

Do you know what it's like, To live in constant strife? Anticipating the time, Because something inside, Holds a sheathed scythe, That'll send you to the afterlife. This is my life. The truth bears the light. And escape you may try, To no avail, you cry. Tribulations and trials, Have defined my miles. Waiting for the axe to fall, Not just for you, but for all.

Never in history has a time been more important than now. Many great persons in many past times have said this. And in all instances they have been correct. Civilization grows, it progresses, it develops, and in each minute of each day, the significance of that moment is of greater importance than any one before it. Because in each new moment, more sacrifices have been made and more examples of right and wrong are at our disposal. So it is true; never has there been more at stake. Along the winding roads, through the crests and troughs, the journey of humanity has led us to this moment, one in which the bastion of liberty, finds itself at the inflection point of a millennium. 2000 years of war, tyranny, and struggle produced a generation of thinkers, who against all odds, made the ultimate sacrifice. They ventured across the seas, they fought back global powers, and they meticulously and nobly grew and cared for this sapling, in the Land of the Free. It is in this moment that we, as th...

Today, life is good.  Things are behaving as they should.  I'm living as I would, if I could. Tomorrow, life may be bad. Each addition to the day will add, To the growing load, profoundly sad. But life over death will always reign true.  Better to be alive and be blue,  Than to not exist, many would miss you.  So cherish the day, let it soak in. Let this serve as a reminder, a win. Days like today refresh and begin.   

I had a dream last night,  It was the year 2015.  You danced around in the candle light, Like you were 19.  My brain recreated a sight,  That I wish I'd never seen. Why am I thrown back into this fight?  I thought I'd deleted that scene. Now, the Sun sets and the sky turns dark.  I sit by the lamp and read my book.  But my mind is occupied by the lack of a spark, In my own life, yet everywhere I look, I see what I desire, the contrast is stark.  On this night, it's the lonely road I took. I was on a call today, Given some hard news. And I wish, by my side would lay, Someone that I knew.  And together we'd know the way,  We'd piece together the clues. And every night I'd hear them say, I love you too. 

Do you understand that I want nothing more, Than to crawl back under the sheets of your bed? Away from the cold and into your hold, Like a sailor lost at sea who's finally found shore.  Honey, believe me for sure, this is a chore.  Oh, the images I create, I still say no to that face.  Oh, the restraint it takes, not to get in the car and race, Down the highway, through the gate, to your place, And then I'd push the pace, until we wanted to faint, Wait! Stop and take a break. I'm no saint, but surely this ain't, The moment I want to create, Oh, for Heaven's sake, just a taste... No, my conscience makes a stronger case, Don't be a disgrace, exercise restraint.

Book of Matthew, chapter 10, verse 34: "Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the Earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword." The first time I read this verse I was taken aback. I read it after a long weekend of philosophical discussions with friends and family, around the value embedded in religious sentiment and recorded text in establishing a framework for difficult decisions. On that Saturday night I'd spoken with three good friends, on a dimly lit porch, into the wee hours of the night, about the merits of living with a significant other prior to engagement and marriage. Is that a good decision or a bad one? Or more precisely, is it wise or not? This conversation came just 12 hours after I'd had a similar philosophical discussion with my parents that morning about the ideas Sam Harris puts forth in his analysis of religion (as a whole), claiming it to be a mobilizing force in creating conflict and division, instead of progress and wisdom.  The...

I'm drifting. The winds shift, and I'm shifting. I move nearer to truth, moving away from my youth, The burden is heavy, but I'm lifting.  I'm sifting. I think, and I'm thinking.  Through a reservoir of words, to move me towards,  The Logos, I'm riffing.  I'm listening.  The sound of the Currents, "Yes I'm changing." Like a flood, to every end there is a new beginning, "I was drowning but now I'm swimming." I was dreaming. Now my eyes fixate, I'm fixing. And as the tides swell, I come out of my shell, In the ocean of life, I'm living. 

Life is full of truisms, universal truths; things that we all observe and notice. Often, things come full circle. They swing. It's an age-old piece of wisdom, that to do wrong by someone is digging two graves, one for you and one for them. Or put more bluntly, things come back to bite you in the ass. Good things also work this way. Pay it forward. Reap what you sow. These proverbial bits of wisdom are no accident. Life is phasic, it's littered with sagas or stages. Most people go through similar stages in life. We can live vicariously through each other indeed. We recognize epochs in our own life and we recognize them in society. You often see this with parents and their children. In my own life, my father was voted "most attractive" in high school. He taught me how to weightlift when I was little. He developed an incurable disease. Years later I was also given the same superlative, I taught others how to weightlift, and I developed the same incurable disease. Call it...

Life is complicating. All around us systems, technology, infrastructure, even day to day life are complicating before our eyes. Time is scarce, the most common response to "hey how are you," is "busy." Progress is complicated. We're in the midst of a devolution of authenticity .  Systems complicate over time naturally, and we can use entropy as a baseline. But we can be more precise in our analysis of this complication when looking through the lens of knowledge and technology. Technology isn't simplifying it's getting more complicated. The solutions are more derived. Institutions follow the same trend. They get more complicated over time. Think about the modern house. In it exists modems, routers, charging ports, solar roofing panels, smart Tv's, security systems, and a host of appliances, most of which didn't exist just 50 years ago. Think about the tax code and our government. Laws passed nowadays operate through 100 or so beauacracies. The bil...

I do not believe my life to be exceptional or abnormal. Conscious life itself is incomprehensibly rare. In this way, any life led is abnormal and any path taken, exceptional. I do believe that which has separated me the most, given me the slightest fraction of divergence from my peers, are the following behaviors and characteristics: my tendency to be hyper-reflective, even to a fault, hyper-introspective, even given the consequences, and prolific with the recording of memories and thoughts in written form, during extensive durations of experience and maturity. 

I'm grateful for having two parents  I'm grateful for the sacrifices of my parents  I'm grateful for a stable and powerful brain I'm grateful for a solid work ethic I'm grateful for natural ability I'm grateful for physical capability  I'm grateful for knowledge passed to me I'm grateful for engaged coaches I'm grateful for powerful teachers  I'm grateful for the blessing of America I'm grateful for entertaining movies  I'm grateful for thoughtful books I'm grateful for good friends I'm grateful for being able to travel  I'm grateful for my financial stability  I'm grateful for my fortunate experiences I'm grateful for my unfortunate experiences  I'm grateful for my two brothers  I'm grateful for my complete childhood I'm grateful for my disease I'm grateful for my newly stable health I'm grateful for my capacity to love I'm grateful for my past love  I'm grateful for individuals with skill ...

I’ve awoken on the wrong side of the bed. Last night, a dream surfaced memories I’d locked away in a shed. And like a hydra, they reared their ugly heads. I look over at the empty spot that was once her stead.  And I remember the morning light that would make her hair look red.  A realization: I mourn the loss of who she was more than the relationship instead.  But nonetheless, it’s difficult to forget.  She’d lay right there, this girl I thought I’d wed.  And between us, a sea of truths left unsaid.  Like a horse to the water, I was led. A storm formed, a lie at the eye, calm, but deception it was fed. The words ring true, “Man does not live by just bread”. And though knowledge of the truth I may dread, I’m drowning in this sea, if I wish to survive, I must tread.  The truth hurts. Better believe I bled. But once again I’ve awoken from my bed.  It’s a blessing I’m not dead. 

I had a boss, my first boss at Amazon, who used to say something that's always stuck with me. He and I would leave work around 6 pm together, something he encouraged, and on our way out, we'd get shit from our operation partners who'd often stay until 8 or 9 pm. They'd tell us we were working banker hours, or say something like, "oh must be nice." And his response was always the same, "Life is full of choices." This last year I launched my own fulfillment center at Amazon where I was the position that he would have once occupied, and when faced with the same shit from my operation partners, I learned to use that phrase liberally.  But life is full of choices. In fact, life is choices. Your life is the result of the choices you make from the infinite decision tree of time. And lately I've been thinking a lot about this. As I continue to age, and as my experience continues to compound, I learn the meaning of his phrase. It goes deeper than just the...

I look to the phases of my life, And I see the image of a knife, Turning in my gut to cut out my insides, So that I can survive. And side by side, there's an image of the sky. And by my side a dog with greyed eyes. There was a girl once upon a time, dynamic and alive. But we fell by the wayside. In her eyes were feelings of strife about life.   Can I find some peace and quiet?  Been hit with a few punches, I take it in stride. Another phase blows by, like wind in a kite. It's not meant to be trite, but honey, it's just not right. I mean we're not right...  It's quite a sight to see tears falling in spite, Of the obvious nature of my flight. I'm too phasic, it's something I fight.  Well, bygones have gone by. Nothing to forgive, nothing to deny.  Additions to the phases of my life.       

Jordan Peterson's Biblical Series (32 hours) 1. Introduction to the Idea of God (Done) 2. Genesis 1: Chaos and Order (Done) 3. God and the Hierarchy of Authority (Done) 4. Adam and Eve: Self Consciousness, Evil, and Death (Done) 5. Cain and Abel: The Hostile Brothers  (Done) 6. The Psychology of the Flood  (Done) 7. Walking with God: Noah and the Flood (Done) 7.5 Background to the Abrahamic Stories w/ the Pageau brothers (Done) 8. The Phenomenology of the Divine (Done) 9. The Call to Abraham (Done) 10. Abraham: Father of Nations (Done) 11. Sodom and Gomorrah (Done) 12. The Great Sacrifice: Abraham and Isaac (Done) 13. Jacob's Ladder (Done) 14. Jacob: Wrestling with God (Done) 15. Joseph and the Coat of Many Colors (Done) Hillsdale College Online Courses (120 hours) 1. Politics 2. History 3. Literature 4. Philosophy and Religion 5. Natural Sciences Gotham Chess Courses (24 hours) 1. E4 New York Style - With White  (In progress) 2. E6B6 New York Style - With Black 3. D4 Dyn...

Perhaps the most powerful idea that I've been struck by in recent years is Jordan Peterson's central ideology; the key to a better society is better individuals. As an individual this is a straight forward, albeit work intensive task, improve yourself. But for me it has yielded significant results.  When I became the captain of the swim team in High School, I was one of three captains. We all had different leadership styles and after some thought I realized what mine was. Leadership by example. I'm not overly extroverted, particularly articulate, or all that inspiring, but I can work hard and maintain a high level of consistency. People see the success that comes from sustained effort and they emulate it. Humans are mimetic as Rene Gerard pointed out, and not just with emotions but also behaviors.  I saw the same phenomenon as a consultant on a business case team in college where I competed globally at Universities. I wasn't the best on the team when it came to putting ...

The Number For years, I was plagued by, or gifted with a number. How did the number get to me, and why? What did it mean? For the better part of 2 years I saw 3:14 everywhere. I happened to check my phone or watch almost daily at 3:14. I'd see it in passing on a sign or TV. On a few special occasions I even awoke at 3:14 AM and turned to see it on my clock. You could ask some of my friends and old girlfriends, I started to screenshot it after a while. I was taking pictures of it. Remembering every occasion. It had gotten past the point of coincidence. There were essentially two explanations for it. One in the realm of psychology and one in the realm of spirituality. Psychologically, it could have been Viewer's Bias. I could have started subconsciously checking my phone or watch every day around 3:14 to try and maximize my chances of seeing it, so to give credence to that idea and create a feedback loop. If I was doing that I certainly wasn't doing it consciously. Then ther...