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Who are you? Who am I? | Week 48

December | Meaning of Life | Week 48 | 12/3/2023
What is the meaning of life? Part 1 

Of all the questions one might ask themselves most intently and with the deepest sincerity, there is none more sobering than "What is the meaning of life?" This is indeed a beautiful and complicated question. 'Life' can be interpreted as the collective noun or the singular. It can refer to one's own life, or to the conscious experience of life on aggregate. It can reference the purpose of one's own existence or the reason for existence at all. Meaning can be applied to the subjective feeling one gets from an experience or the objective purpose of one's life. These 6 words, punctuated with a question mark, have occupied the minds of billions since the very first mind could be captivated by a question. I feel there is no better way to conclude this introspective journey that I've embarked on over the past year, than to ask myself the deepest, most elusive, most profound question of all. It is now, and will remain a goal of my life, to add to the generations of philosophical pontification, to add a stich to the golden thread of history, by contributing and perhaps even progressing, the perennial search for wisdom that our species so valiantly and reluctantly betrothed many millennia ago. As I sit with the soothing piano sounds of Ludovico Einaudi in my ears I fear the abdication of that responsibility, and therefore am inspired to record my thoughts clearly and concisely, so that I may return to this essay in many decades with affection and admiration. 

My mind is pulled in many directions simultaneously when I query my soul for the answer to this difficult question. Not only, what is the answer, but what do I truly believe? How do I act in reference to this question? Do I treat my life as though it has a singular meaning? Do I behave as if other's lives have meaning? Does that meaning extend to the species or is it specific to me? Is 'life' an accident or a divine gift? Do accidents have meaning if they're not directed towards an end? Gifts are given because they have meaning from the sender, but the subjectivity of the recipient can nullify the meaning adorned by the gift giver. Am I even capable of being objective in answering the question? Or is my subjectivity the injection of value which gives this question credence to be asked. My mind races, and I ask for wisdom. From my mentors in the East, I'm reminded of the Zen Buddhism terms Satori and Kensho - the 'deep comprehension' and understanding of reality that can and will arise from Zen stillness and the 'observation of nature'. From my mentors in the West, Psalm 46:10 and Matthew 7:7 - "Be still and know that I am God. "Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you." So, I engage patience and stillness, riding the proverbial waves of thought which arise, not fighting them, waiting for a pattern to emerge, for a clarity of direction, for truth. 

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